Silent Night

This, That, and The Other

“Jake,” Sandra said, “you keep waking me up throughout the night with your snoring. Sometimes you snort so loud that it gives me quite a fright. I need my sleep, Jake, so please, you need to figure out a way to refrain yourself.”

“Refrain myself?” Jake said. “How the hell am I supposed to do that? It’s not like I’m doing it intentionally. I’m not even aware of it, and yet here you are trying to vilify me over something I can’t control.”

“There are sleep specialists who can help you with your snoring, Jake,” Sandra said. “You can go see one. They have these machines that are supposed to combat sleep apnea.”

“There’s no way I’m going to hook myself up to some bulky machine,” Jake said. “Just deal with it, dammit.”

“I’ve tried, Jake,” Sandra said, “but I’m exhausted, Your snoring is keeping me up all…

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